Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Living My Questions

Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart
and try to love the questions themselves.
Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be 
given you because you would not be able 
to live them.  And the point is to live everything.
Live the questions now.  Perhaps you will then
gradually, without noticing it, live along some 
distant day into the answers.

~Rainer Maria Rilke  LETTER TO A YOUNG POET


 
These last two week my life has been full of stillness and recognition.  I recognize all around me small wonders, key words in books I read, meditations I have chosen to make part of my healing process, comments my therapist will make, small wonders which if I am still enough to let them sink in tell me I am on the path.  I am where I should be.  I AM LIVING THE QUESTIONS.  My questions.  I call these small wonders "Tender Mercies" because I believe that God loves me so much and knows me so well that he gives me tender mercies to remind me that He is there and that my Savior's love is unending.

I can't believe I can actually say this, I like the part of healing where I don't have the answers and I have to step out into the darkness.  I have never felt this way before.

13 comments:

  1. HI VICKi-

    Beautiful post - heartfelt sentiments with such loving surrender as you move along your life's journey. And I know well the times of darkness, wonder, waiting for enlightenment - newness and rebirth - it is a powerful, still reflective time so necessary to the journey - trust it as you are and when you come in to the light again the brightness will be glorious.

    Love Gail
    peace.....

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  2. I have always loved that quote. Living the questions can be a time of growth. Glad you are in a good place.

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  3. Wow! I feel the same this week! And this is the second time I have read this quote this week, which I just LOVE. I'm so happy for you in this place, and for me. And I love the new look of your blog. It feels like spring over here :)

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  4. That is so great!!! It is wonderful to be able to feel the warmth and light instead of the darkness. I hope your journey continues to be a positive one!
    Lindsey Petersen

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  5. Hi Vicki,

    I love the questions too. :)

    Good and healing thoughts to you.

    Kate

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  6. An original and interesting blog. Best wishes from EU and Romania!
    Daniel D. Peaceman, writer and editor of CHM

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  7. I love that quote at the top! I've never heard it before. I love that you are embracing those questions, those tender mercies and walking into the dark with confidence, peace, and hope!

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  8. it's so brave to like to live in the questions...i haven't gotten there yet. maybe someday...

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  9. I found you at the blog carnival against Child abuse.. I love this. I don't think I realized at the time I was living in the questions, but looking back I can see those moments. This is apowerful place to be. one I hope all survivors one day are able to live and be comfortable and trust in the love of God who knows the questions and the answers..

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  10. Wow, Vicki! That is HUGE! Kudos to you. I like that Rilke quote, but have to admit that it is very hard for me to live that way much of the time.

    I can't tell you how excited I am to see you participating in the carnival again. Yay, Vicki! :) (((((((((((Vicki))))))))))))

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  11. Vicki, enjoy the space you are in right now. When I reconnected with my heart and quiet living in just my head, I had to learn that it was the questions rather than the answer that are most often important. My heart knows better than my head. Glad to see you in a good place.

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  12. that is beautiful, vicki~ thank you for sharing these wise reflections...

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  13. I love the small wonders. Your post reminds me of th song by Rob Thomas - Little Wonders - from Meet the Robinsons.

    let it go,
    let it roll right off your shoulder
    don't you know
    the hardest part is over
    let it in,
    let your clarity define you
    in the end
    we will only just remember how it feels

    our lives are made
    in these small hours
    these little wonders,
    these twists & turns of fate
    time falls away,
    but these small hours,
    these small hours still remain

    let it slide,
    let your troubles fall behind you
    let it shine
    until you feel it all around you
    and i don't mind
    if it's me you need to turn to
    we?ll get by,
    it's the heart that really matters in the end

    our lives are made
    in these small hours
    these little wonders,
    these twists & turns of fate
    time falls away,
    but these small hours,
    these small hours still remain

    all of my regret
    will wash away some how
    but i can not forget
    the way i feel right now

    in these small hours
    these little wonders
    these twists & turns of fate
    these twists & turns of fate
    time falls away but these small hours
    these small hours, still remain,
    still remain
    these little wonders
    these twists & turns of fate
    time falls away
    but these small hours
    these little wonders still remain.

    I feel like my alters are the little wonders that still remain. They helped me get through my childhood.

    God Bless you,
    Sunshine

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